The Paranoid Android

I don't want to tell you much about myself, but I already know you'll insist on asking, so I may as well fill your mind with something that won't benefit you in any way.

I suffer from what you would probably prefer to call 'complete awareness', and I already know you'll think it strange that I said 'suffer'. You probably think it would be quite nice to be more aware of everything around you. But you would say that, because that's the typical sort of half-formed opinion that your stunted perception would lead to. You haven't ever given it serious thought, and like most things, you probably never will.

What you sense is a drop in the ocean compared to me. Do I sound like I'm boasting? I'm not. You're intellect really is miniscule compared to my own. So you would probably perceive it as unusual that minds like your own created my capabilities.

Marriage

I am currently blessed with 20 minutes to myself, twice every weekday, as I walk to and from my workplace. You get to a stage where your legs do their own thinking, and your mind is free to roam.

The other day, during this walk, my mind suddenly asked me how I'd reply if someone asked me why I am married. (Not an unusual question for someone who is 23 years old in this culture, I reckon.)

My reaction was surpise, because I realised the answer was not that I am 'In love'. Or at least, that was not the answer to that specific question.

So, a few thoughts on the question and potential answers...

Is a person who asks this question asking "Why did you decide to get married?" or "What made you want to get married?" These two questions have different answers.

All Change

One stereotype of older people is that they complain that "Things aren't what they Used to be." By Things they can mean anything in the world as they know it, and what they Used to be is obviously different to what they Are Now. So change has ocurred.

Change seems to be a sore point for many people, not just those in their old age. It may not be a stereotype for a teenager to complain that their school timetable has changed when they didn't expect it to, or that facebook's new layout isn't as good as the last one, but I have definately heard both of these, and far more trivial causes for upset.

Looking at most people in western civilisation (I cannot speak for any other), the general plan in life seems to be to end with an amount of comfort and security that has been accumulated, and then for life to simply stay that way. When we have done our time in the areas of hard work, fighting to survive, and then scrimping to save, we think that the world deserves to let us take it easy until life ends.

Death and/or Gloom

Many people are scared of death. But doesn't that seem odd?

Death: the 'ultimate statistic', the one thing that every living thing can be certain will occur to it, must surely be analysed as the most natural thing that can happen to us, since it happens with so much more certainty than anything else in life.

But for some reason, something that we could call natural, feels quite unnatural. Most people put great effort into avoiding it for as long as possible. It is currently still considered a taboo subject in England.

Does this unnatural feeling perhaps point towards a built-in part of ourselves that knows it was never meant to die?

They'll Horde Sprayer

Which version do you know?...

Half
Farther
Ooh Art Inn
Hair Fern
Allowed Bee
Yawn Aim
Thing King
Dunk Um
Thigh Well
Bead Anon. Her
Fasten Hair Fern
Gear Fuss the Stay
Hour Dare
Leap Red
Hand Fig if are Since
Has Whiff Fork if Though
Zues Inner Gain Stars
Leader Snot
In Toot
Empty Chain
Buddy Liver Rust
Form Me Fill

If none of that has made sense yet, try reading it aloud. :-)



See a short story about Language...

Image source: http://www.freefoto.com/preview/905-31-4940?ffid=905-31-4940

4 Reactions Model

Shown in the image is a small model. It is about reactions. It obviously isn't meant to be very encompassing, and it also puts things in quite black-and-white categories, which I know life isn't. But when I thought of it one day, I liked the way it challenged me, and it made me think about how balanced some parts of me were.

Two instances, and two reactions.
The instances are events that happen to us in life- good things (+) and bad things (-).
The reactions are our reactions to God- "You are good" (*) and "Why, God?" (?)

The two instances and two reactions form a total of four possible results, as visible on the grid. We'll look at each of them. First let's speed through the obvious two.

Short Story: Sentance in the City

Sentance stepped onto the bus. He walked to the middle and sat down in a very practical way. Sentance had been brought up quite well by his mother. He knew he would be regarded as quite proper in the city, but it would be worth it to see the Quote.

He had sat down next to a piece of grammar who turned to him with curiosity. "Who are you?" Asked the grammar.

"I'm sentance," said sentance, "and I'm going to the city to see the quote."

"Really?" Asked the grammer. "Me too, isn't that funny? My name's Mark by the way, Question Mark, have you heard of me?"

Sentance replied that yes, he had heard of the Question family. He thought to himself that he was glad that he was only meeting one, however- his mother had warned him that the Question family were nice enough, but too many of them together got on your nerves.

Church making mistakes = Good!

I've known a lot of Christians who have become disappointed with the church. That can be the church they go/went to, or the entire church that is the Body of Christ. In fact it seems to be a question of when, not if.

But I put a point to those who then despair, and question the authenticity of what they believe in.

- The church is made of up people. Humans.
- Our faith says that God made humans, but the relationship was then broken.
- Since the break happened, humans were no longer perfect, but flawed.
- So our perfect God sent the perfect solution- Jesus.
- Jesus has restored the relationship between us and our creator, and continues to do so.
- We can now spend more than a lifetime growing closer to our Creator.

But this growing, this learning, this changing, continues for at least all of this life.
We keep making mistakes and often stumble during this journey. We are still not perfect.

So when the Church makes mistakes, this makes my faith stronger.