Christians Dating Non-Christians

The subject of Christians dating people who are not Christians is one to be careful with. It probably doesn't help that the subject only ever seems to be raised when someone is doing it and someone else wants to tell them why it is wrong.

Both sides of the argument about whether it is OK or not refer to a few bits in the Bible, sometimes the same ones! I am going to leave the task of interpreting scripture regarding this to minds smarter than my own. But I would like to describe 4 possible things that a person may consciously or unconsciously mean when they say "It's wrong for a Christian to date a non-Christian", and my thoughts on each motive or reason.

A Thought About Funerals

A typical service in a Christian church has two main parts of the program: A time of musical worship, and a time for a sermon to be preached. Worship followed by learning, adoration leading to instruction.

This order enables the congregation to first focus on God and their relationship with Him. The sermon that follows can then be engaged with in a good frame of mind, in a more accurate sense of context. Worship enables me to momentarily break the habit of focusing on myself, of placing myself at the centre of the universe, and instead focus on God, placing Him in the centre of everything. When biblical teaching is received, we should first apply it to our relationship or understanding of God, and only to mankind after this. Worship could be said in this way to not only provide an accurate context for any sermon, but for any part of our daily lives.

If a typical church service consists of worship and then practical application, then I propose that funeral services are the reverse of this.

Seeking God, Doubting Church

I haven't doubted the existence of God for a long time. The creator of the universe has been too big and too apparent in my life for that to happen. I believe God exists, and that I am in relationship with Him, but I have doubted the western church.

All of the churches that I have gone to in the U.K. have the same format: First, the congregation sings some songs. Then, someone preaches a sermon. The songs and sermon format has been a universal experience for me across both traditional and charismatic churches, but I have found myself wondering if the songs and sermon are at all related to a relationship with the creator of the universe.

Focus in Prayer

Often in Church services or gatherings with other Christians, there is time for prayer. By prayer I could mean listening to God, talking to Him, or hopefully both. But my mind, like many, is easily distracted. I can find it difficult to focus for more than a minute. Here are some of the things that I have found affect me personally. What affects you?

Silence does not help.

Silence is too much of an empty canvas. Sometimes when I come home from work I let myself spend a few moments sitting on the sofa doing nothing just to let my imagination out. It can be like an animal that's been pawing at the door all day because it wants to get outdoors. Giving myself space and silence lets my mind breathe a sigh of relief and become less focused, not more.

4 Definitions of Church

The word "Church" has had four different meanings to me so far. These definitions have been a mixture of nouns (names) and verbs (actions), and the latest two replace, for me, the earliest two... Sort of...

These different views on one word seem to stem from what you believe about spirituality, people, and what you believe the Bible says.

Noun 1: Church the Building

This is what most non-believers probably think of. A church is a building, a physical construction, a piece of architecture, maybe even just a historic artefact that is badly in need of repair. This view, of course, misses the fact that the christian church existed before buildings to contain it existed. So the shell has been mistaken for the organism. An easy, and understandable, mistake.

Giving: Africa vs. UK

In African church services, giving money is done very differently to how it's done in English church services.

The African churches I have visited have involved everyone getting off their seats, and dancing joyfully in a line to the front, where they drop their donation into the box or bowl. Music sets the pace, and you really get the sense of joyful giving that the Bible says God wants.

Switch over to a sunday morning in England- and I'm even talking about charismatic churches here- and it's a very different scene. The sung worship in some british services may be similar in style, but instead of the time of giving being a focussed and celebrated event, baskets or boxes are passed covertly along the rows of seats, so that people are distracted as little as possible from their singing.

Church making mistakes = Good!

I've known a lot of Christians who have become disappointed with the church. That can be the church they go/went to, or the entire church that is the Body of Christ. In fact it seems to be a question of when, not if.

But I put a point to those who then despair, and question the authenticity of what they believe in.

- The church is made of up people. Humans.
- Our faith says that God made humans, but the relationship was then broken.
- Since the break happened, humans were no longer perfect, but flawed.
- So our perfect God sent the perfect solution- Jesus.
- Jesus has restored the relationship between us and our creator, and continues to do so.
- We can now spend more than a lifetime growing closer to our Creator.

But this growing, this learning, this changing, continues for at least all of this life.
We keep making mistakes and often stumble during this journey. We are still not perfect.

So when the Church makes mistakes, this makes my faith stronger.