God and Small Talk


A few years ago I started putting a question into conversations with friends who I knew were Christians. I was interested in both their response and their answers. The question was, “So how are things between you and God?” or, if they didn’t understand this, I would add “What has God done for you lately?”

I ask people this question for two reasons. First, I am passionate about God, and since I know I get excited by what He does in my own life, I know I would get equally excited by the things He is doing in my friend’s lives. It’s like being nosey, but in a good way. The second reason is to make a point, and hopefully to help some Christians to try and fight what I am trying to fight- the unspoken taboo that is our relationships with God.


The idea that a Christian’s relationship with God would be taboo seems odd. But the strangest part is that it is only taboo when we are with other Christians. For some reason, we are less than willing to talk personally about God with the very people we share the most in common with. Evangelism is fine, because we are doing God’s work… but talking about my prayer life with my spiritual brother is weird…

Why is it so difficult to talk about the meaning of our lives? Maybe it’s not the God bit, but the personal bit that makes us tense up. Maybe we’re just too British. But that doesn’t seem to apply to other topics of conversation- how difficult do you find it to talk about your sports injury, your politics at work, or the details of your romantic relationship with a good friend?

I will take some inspiration from Dr. Neil T. Anderson, writer of the Freedom In Christ books, and suggest that the Flesh part of us wants to avoid wherever possible acknowledging the Spirit part of us. For the fallen part of our nature, our old habits, it is easiest to deny on a conscious and subconscious level that anything beyond what we can see and touch exists. This is why prayer is so difficult. Acting on the basis that a spiritual world exists, acknowledging God in a sound and sensible way, seems to be nails on a chalkboard to part of us.

Whether I’m talking to God, or to someone else about my relationship with Him, part of me isn’t liking it. We want to turn the focus to something else. Thus our evangelistic conversations turn from God to Christianity, churches, or even science vs. faith. Every time when I have asked someone “How are things between you and God?” they have given a bit of an answer, and then turned the focus back onto me by reflecting the question. Only one man has ever physically sighed with relief that I wanted to talk about something so deep instead of the usual small talk.

The idea that this question, that skipping the small talk and stepping straight into the topic of our King, could bring a smile of relief to people who yearn to share their adventures, is a dream of mine. In theory, I think that every person in a relationship with Jesus should find it difficult not to talk about Him more often. But in reality, our joy has obviously yet to grow so large that it overtakes our politeness, our fear of man, and our awkwardness. I want my joy to grow beyond all of that. After I have told you how I have recently experienced my amazing God, will you tell me how amazing He is to you?




Image source: http://www.philolzophy.com/2011/04/other-existential-questions-we-pondered-this-weekend/

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