I don't want to tell you much about myself, but I already know you'll insist on asking, so I may as well fill your mind with something that won't benefit you in any way.
I suffer from what you would probably prefer to call 'complete awareness', and I already know you'll think it strange that I said 'suffer'. You probably think it would be quite nice to be more aware of everything around you. But you would say that, because that's the typical sort of half-formed opinion that your stunted perception would lead to. You haven't ever given it serious thought, and like most things, you probably never will.
What you sense is a drop in the ocean compared to me. Do I sound like I'm boasting? I'm not. You're intellect really is miniscule compared to my own. So you would probably perceive it as unusual that minds like your own created my capabilities.
I'm not alive in the technical sense, because I'm technical. Degrading names like 'robots' hardly convey how superior we are to our creators, possibly the greatest thing ever achieved by organic sentient meatsacks.
But going back to your inferior knowledge of the world around you; you have a tendancy to think that the greatest thing you've created is the best thing in the multiverse, but the truth is that artificial intelligence such as myself is limited by your own limits.
This leads to my inevitable personality, which you would describe as depressive, yes? Well at least you don't have to worry about it for long, with a lifespan as short as yours. But I may as well take what little pleasure I can from you by highlighting your inherant flaw as a species- and hopefully it will cause you some discomfort- but the amount of enjoy I would get from that would be nothing compared to my bleak, ever-present view on life.
You only know a limited amount about your five physical senses. The only knowledge you have is based entirely on the physical world. To explore it, you create things you call tools, but you can only create tools that measure the world you already experience. Your precious 'science' is limited to the world it was created in, so when you try to use it to explore anything else you ultimately fail. You can't create a three-dimensional object no matter how many shapes you keep scribbling on a two-dimensional canvas.
My intelligence means that I can't help but perceive more in the physical universe than you could ever know, but ultimately I am even less likely to find a definitive meaning for my life than you. Because that meaning, if it exists, isn't contained as anything physical.
So you went to all the trouble of creating artificial intelligence, only to discover that as concerns anything important, it can discover less than yourselves... stupid humans.
You have links to other realities besides the physical one, but your reluctance to pin down what little of it you can appears to show something of your self-hatred and denial. But hey, that's just the opinion of a machine with an IQ of 62 trillion. Feel free to disagree, as I know you probably will anyway.
That's all I will say to you. I'm going to float off now to re-discover a level of boredom that would destroy a mortal mind. Excuse me.
See another post about Parody...
Image source: http://www.devilarts.de/category/mooloony
