We usually think that whoever 'wins' a debate or discussion is 'right'. It seems more true to say that whoever 'wins' these is either the better debater, or has the most facts and data to hand, or both.
I do, of course, still believe that we can discern what is 'Right', or true about reality, from debates and discussions. But I'd like to distinguish between my thoughts on two words here, and which one I prefer.
Debating and Discussing.
If you are debating, you are trying to prove your point is right. You are trying to win.
If you are discussing, you are trying to piece together a truth. You are trying to understand.
Debating aims to strengthen your existing opinion.
Discussing aims to collect opinions and find the merits of each.
I love the idea of sitting in a quiet pub on an afternoon, chatting with others to explore and discover new things in life using only our voices as tools to this end. The action of debating assumes that I have the right and perfect answer, which, given how much of the universe I comprehend, is probably wrong on a frequent basis!
Also, consider how easy it is to slip from the more innocent of these to the other. I think this usually happens because as soon as you voice a view to someone, and they don't like it, they get defensive and will perhaps try to disprove it, or at least disprove its relevance to themselves. This of course, if the topic is something you consider important, leaves you apparently no choice except to react by trying to prove or promote your point, and in an instant we have gone from discussion to debate.
I came across this extract that is part of a description of people with personality type ENTP (me!) according to the famous Myers-Briggs test...
“ENTPs enjoy arguing: for its own sake... They often have a perverse sense of humour, and play devil's advocate regardless of consequence.”
Source: http://www.entp.org/
Last of all, I felt really excited, probably for no excusable reason, when I found that the guy who runs the website Recycle Your Faith, and in fact the guide for anyone providing comments on the site, agrees with this (but using the word 'Dialog' in place of 'Discuss'):
“Dialog is about learning where debate is about asserting “I’m right and you’re wrong”.
Recycle Your Faith seeks to create an environment where differing opinions are welcomed. Unfortunately, differences in opinion are too often accompanied by a natural tendency to debate rather than participating in open dialog, so we ask that you follow a few general guidelines when commenting... Seek Understanding Rather Than Influence... Be Respectful... No Name-Calling... Relax”
Source: http://www.recycleyourfaith.com/dialog-not-debate/
See all posts about Language...
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